The Conscript


Designation: Anti-infantry
Training Headquarters: First Kremlin Recruitment Centre
Trained at: Soviet Barracks
Motto: "Our homeland will protect our bones!"

Equipment:

• ADK-45 7.62mm assault rifle
• Overcoat with division insignia
• XL synthetic rucksack with a capacity of 20 litres
• Fabric strips to protect the feet
• Fashionable fur hat



In the Soviet Union, military service is regarded as a rite of passage, for both boys and girls, into a patriotic adulthood. And, like coming of age, this rite is not optional. There are many different opportunities, and depending on their academic results and family circumstances, they may end up serving behind a desk or manning a machine gun for the glory of Russia and all its Sister Republics. Of all the young Soviets entering the armed forces, a large percentage are boys with no particular physical or intellectual distinguishing features. These boys, once properly trained and equipped, are no longer just boys: they are Conscripts.


Conscripts are the infantry of the Soviet Union. Shown here is a propaganda poster depicting an unusually brave, determined and confident Conscript.

Enlisted by the millions, Conscripts are conditioned from a very young age – long before their conscription, in fact – to believe in an inevitable victory and the glory of the Soviet struggle against its treacherous enemies. Conscripts completing their military service are also promised a handsome reward, which is all the more reason why they approach what turns out to be an almost suicidal mission with almost giddy enthusiasm. Although poorly trained, they are armed with large-calibre assault rifles, as well as bags filled with a highly volatile, cheap mixture that can be used as a basic explosive. Reports of conscripts drinking this substance for fun and subsequently falling ill or dying are dismissed as clearly false by the Soviet media.

The Soviet Union is famously proud of its ‘highly effective’ conscript training programme, which centres on a series of compulsory training videos that instruct conscripts on how to hold a firearm correctly, salute high-ranking Officers, shout authorised Soviet battle cries and more. (Note that Conscripts are never taught to swim, allegedly due to the risk of desertion.) Surveys involving conscripts build on this series of videos, with soldiers being genuinely inspired and enthusiastic about combat, whilst the few who are dissatisfied are sent to the gulags straight away. Conscripts are also particularly grateful for their training, which has taught them to wield the famous ADK-45 assault rifle, a cheap and effective firearm capable of easily destroying unarmoured targets. In addition to their marksmanship training, the Conscripts learn how to mix and throw explosive Molotov cocktails correctly – named after the great Soviet barman who invented the concoction, having become annoyed when his customers refused to leave his establishment. Overall, the Conscripts are quite accurate with these weapons, which can cause significant damage to structures or targets that are too slow to evade the attack.


Their lack of skill and training is offset by their respectable firepower.

It bears repeating that Conscripts have the shortest life expectancy of virtually any Soviet force, and rarely live beyond the average age of 26 before being killed or promoted. The Union relies heavily on its millions of ill-informed citizens to swell its ranks and then, in practice, allows them to march straight into slaughter. Some critics have theorised that the Union deliberately seeks a high casualty rate amongst Conscripts so that there are fewer veterans who can return home to contradict the extremely positive career prospects presented to prospective Conscripts undergoing training in propaganda videos. Russia has imprisoned as many critics as it could on charges of slander, defamation or treason.


Reconnaissance on the battlefield has at least revealed the following facts about the Conscripts:

• Equipped to withstand- The Conscripts’ assault rifles are sufficiently powerful against enemy infantry, especially as the Conscripts tend to outnumber their enemies. Their Molotov cocktails are a useful alternative against structures and slow-moving targets.

-Inexpensive to train- Probably the best thing that can be said about the Conscripts is that the Union has managed to completely streamline their training, making them readily available for use in battle. Still, these men’s value is limited: their weapons have a short range for attacking aircraft, and they cannot swim either.

-Poorly protected- Given that Conscripts aren’t even issued a decent pair of socks to wear, just imagine what modern weaponry can do to them. In practice, they’re small enough to avoid serious damage from anti-tank weapons, but they can’t withstand much fire from small-calibre weapons.

-Smoking out the bad guys - Thanks to their Molotov cocktails, the Conscripts are surprisingly effective against enemies taking up positions inside buildings. A few well-aimed cocktails thrown through a window will probably take out any hostile units inside, without setting the building alight.